Why Me???

What the hell did I do to deserve this? There I was happily sitting on the rack with Snoopy, a bunny rabbit, and various other oh-so-adorable head covers in the golf shop, looking forward to spending the rest of my life on the back of old Geezer McBee's golf cart. But no, instead of keeping company with a 3 Wood, I somehow ended strapped down by some wannabe biker to the back of this 200 decibel moving hurricane. Evel Knievel here is making some wild ass prediction about a cross country ride. With me. Right. And I'm gonna find my way into Tiger Woods' bag. Dream on, biker boy. If you get two blocks past your driveway I'll eat my flipper. Just untie me and we'll end this little charade, OK?